Lincoln's Humorous Ditties

These are some of the humorous e-mail messages I've received over the years. I hope they give you as much joy as they have given me.

Why Is it That...? A Cat Died and Went to Heaven. What a Jerk. How Would it Be If Men Got Pregnant.
Try Doing This, It'll Drive People Nuts. The Following Is a Partial List of Actual Written Excuses Given to Teachers in The Albuquerque Public School System by Parents of Students. Winners of The "Worst Analogies Ever Written in a High School Essay" Contest How Much Does Michael Jordan Get Paid.
Darwin Award Winner For 1997 Announced How to Win Arguments From Actual Transcripts of Court Cases LA Proficiency Test.
Family Rules Bitter Men Say the Meanest Things Computer Programming Funnies Politically Correct Way to Call Someone Stupid
The Pastor Only a Trekky Would Understand. 54 Reasons Why Captain Janeway Is Better Than Captain Picard. Kids Views On Love
Miscellaneous Funnies Computer Viruses Men Who Use Computers Are The New Sex Symbols of The `90s  
Novell Aids Microsoft A Computer Programmer Meets The Devil A Software Problem?!! A Chicken Crosses The Road On Star Trek
Your Too Serious About Computers If... Toy Story Stats Your An Engineer If...